So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
