How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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