i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Actions speak louder than pants.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize
