North Korea, Best Korea!
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize