if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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