I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
