Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
