as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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