I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
