Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
