this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
