I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
