did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
4 words: hood of his car
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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