come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Randomize
