is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
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