just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Vodka?
Forever.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
