she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
