He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
