I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
