i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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