I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
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