Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
