Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Randomize