You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
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