NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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