In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
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