I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
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