yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Randomize
