did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
