At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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