Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
