She's JV to your varsity
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
