lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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