U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize