well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
