I wanna passion pit in your ass
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Randomize
