Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
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