we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize
