I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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