After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
