paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize