I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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