when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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