do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
