i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
