I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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