summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
