You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
