WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
