it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize
