My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
