I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I will be naked everywhere
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize
